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Dear Dr. Romance:
I'm a couple of years into my relationship with many problems. I met my guy online and he moved the relationship along rather quickly. His eagerness even made me a bit nervous. After a couple of months being with him, I began to fall for him and fell in ... Views: 1334
Dear Dr. Romance:
I'm still having a bit of trouble letting go and cutting off communication with a guy who mistreats me. I understand in my head that this is not right, but I can't seem to get it emotionally. Yesterday was his birthday and particularly difficult to ... Views: 1409
Although most people in the country wouldn’t agree, we in Southern California have been having extreme weather conditions for us: rain and mudslides. You could almost say we’re so used to mild conditions that we become afraid of what others would call “real” ... Views: 1505
I thought if I played by the rules and did everything the way THEY said I should like a good little Catholic girl, I’d feel safe. I’d grow up, get married and have lots of kids like my Mom and live happily ever after.
Why would I even think that since Mom wasn’t living happily ever ... Views: 1891
The idea of detachment mesmerized me when I heard about it in Al-Anon. To let go of the ones you love seemed unloving and uncaring and certainly not Christian. But it also seemed to be the NIRVANA you could reach even while living with an alcoholic.
I detached from my alcoholic father by ... Views: 2045
Could it be that all of our problems stem from not listening to God? If prayer is talking to God and intuition is God talking to us, maybe we need to listen more. When I was in the midst of my crazy life with alcoholics from my father to my husbands, I felt abandoned by God because I prayed and ... Views: 1412
There is a big difference between wanting to experience a sense of control over one’s life, and wanting to control other people. When one experiences a sense of control over their life, it means that they’re not going to feel as though they have no control and as though they are a victim.
... Views: 1453
By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
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Do you often see people as you want them to be rather than as they are? Has this caused you problems in your relationships?
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“We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.” ... Views: 1088
By Margaret Paul, Ph.D.
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The disturbing lack of a personal spiritual connection that many experience has huge ramifications for our planet.
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How are we doing as inhabitants of this beautiful planet? Sometimes ... Views: 1143
Talking sweet is about finding your "sugar" even if you're not happy and want to discuss a problem with your man. This is about speaking your power and speaking from your feminine.
Using words describing your feelings in order to say what does not feel good to your man is how you talk ... Views: 1641
Dear Dr. Romance:
My best girlfriend ever and I dated for about eight months, then had a long distance relationship when she went back to her home country. She just broke up with me over email and she is dating someone from her home city for the last month. I thought we were ... Views: 1550
When life hands me a very difficult time, and I feel defeated and overwhelmed, I enter a hopeless and helpless state of mind I think of as The Little Orphan girl. This is the way I felt, as a teen, when I lost nearly my whole family, father, aunts and uncles, between the ages of 12 and 18. ... Views: 1524
When you go for shopping, you come across many products of your choice and you choose something that you like obviously in terms of beauty, quality, and price. When you have no choice available, you go to the item you are in need of. When there are some choices, you do a little comparison of ... Views: 1637
While one can have the need to experience relationships that are fulfilling and life affirming, it doesn’t mean that this is what takes place. Instead, one can end up in relationships that are not only unfulfilling, they could also be extremely abusive.
And if this was an area of life that ... Views: 1447
There's a lot of misinformation about divorce, and Dr. Romance would like to clear up some of the confusion.
Here are 11 things people will not tell you about divorce.
1. Divorce will not make you happier, unless you’re leaving an abusive relationship.2. Divorce sometimes seems ... Views: 1580
It is important for human beings to work together, and this is because they’re interdependent; they need each other. So when they’re able to put their differences to one side and to find a common ground, their own lives are going to be a lot easier.
This doesn’t mean that everyone needs to ... Views: 1659
We all have different kinds of mind-sets, personalities, attitudes, beliefs, values, predispositions, perceptual tendencies, and habits overall. We live by our behavioural, cognitive and emotional trails in one way or the other. These traits are our identity, pride, recognition, esteem, and ... Views: 1550
Dear Dr. Romance:
I hope you don't mind me writing you but I came across an article that you said: "The best interest of the child also could preclude a mom from gaining custody," says Dr. Tessina. "If a judge doesn't deem that the mother meets the ... Views: 1564
Want to be powerful in your relationships? Learn emotional self-control. Learning to take charge of your emotions means you can’t be “set off” by someone else. You control your reactions, they don’t control you. When you’re too reactive to your partner, he or she ... Views: 1257
Dear Dr. Romance:
I read your Dr Romance Blog and a small paragraph on "10 Reasons to Dump a Guy." I'm trying to find out why I can't find a woman, or better put: why I cant I spark the interest of a woman? I'm 40 years old I was never married nor do I ... Views: 1514
Many people feel trapped in a relationship, yet fail to do anything about it.
The reasons for staying stuck are numerous, including assuming it’s better for the children to stay, illness or lack of physical mobility or stamina, financial restrictions, fear of retaliation, fear of being ... Views: 1358
Consider the following examples for a while:
a. You are on your way and you come across a mother with her sweet toddler child. You start cuddling him/her and ignore the mother totally (no eye contact)
b. You meet someone you know on your way, with his or her spouse. For you, the spouse is a ... Views: 1669
Human beings are interdependent and this means that relationships are a vital part of their ability to survive and to thrive. And while they need to have relationships with others, they also need to be in relationships that are fulfilling.
For instance, one could be in a relationship and ... Views: 2089
Maybe it’s just me. But lately, I’ve run into far too many people who I would best describe as “life-diminishing.” They are filled with judgments, criticisms, and negativity. They are quick to tell others what they must do, what they must refrain from doing, what they should and shouldn’t do, ... Views: 1350
Shopping for a birthday or holiday gift for your significant other can leave you with the gift day blues. There are only so many times that you can give him tickets to a game or a gift card before even he'll start rolling his eyes. This year you can surprise him with something completely ... Views: 1062
In my counseling practice, couples are often surprised to learn they can communicate and solve problems effectively without fighting; but sometimes you may find it’s not so easy to give up your struggles. You may have trouble letting go of the fighting habit because of two factors: social ... Views: 1621
How parents introduce their children to others impact on their personalities strongly. There are many examples that may clarify the concept better. Let us consider:
A parent is introducing his/her child to his/her relative/friend and says with a smiling face-
a. She is too aggressive. ... Views: 1755
Human beings have the need to reach out and to connect and the need to pull away and be by themselves. This is normal and the amount of time that is required with another and by oneself is naturally going to vary from person to person. It can come down to what is going in their life and how they ... Views: 1714
Do you ever feel stressed out about the demands of day-to-day life?
My clients Ava and Leo were doing their best to balance high-pressure jobs with the needs of two school-aged kids and time for themselves.
Their work got done, and well. But the number of tasks they juggled every day made ... Views: 1574
Dear Dr. Romance:
For several years, I’d been a self proclaimed lesbian who was only attracted to women and only involved in intimate relationships with women (the idea of intimacy with a man, even when one hit on me in public, literally made me nauseous)The one exception was my childhood ... Views: 1387
What do you really believe about relationships, starting with yourself?
It is widely accepted that about 90% of our belief system (BS) was formed by the age of 7. To know what we really believe about relationships would be critical as it has shaped how we view them today at least to the ... Views: 1245
Circular Dating is a tool used in the Rori Raye (www.coachrori.com) Method of relationship Coaching.
Let me start off by saying that Circular Dating is NOT about “dating” a whole bunch of men at one time.
Circular Dating is interacting with men!
Circular Dating is all about ... Views: 2020
Here's A Relationship Question From Jessica:
Jessica says “I met B at a wedding a few months ago and we hit it off nice. After a few dates we started sleeping together and we’ve been in a relationship since then.
The first 3 months were hot and heavy, but since last week B suddenly ... Views: 5449
Evolving Relationships and Sexuality Calls for a new kind of Therapist
Sex is simple, except it's not. As our society becomes increasingly exposed to sex, increasingly educated and connected, and more aware of sexual potential, a gap in the area of education and teaching has become glaringly ... Views: 1205
Recently, I adopted a rescue dog - a one year old German Shepherd - and as is true of most rescue dogs, he was an anxious, insecure puppy. Nonetheless, as I stood in front of him and gently petted his head, I was surprised when he cringed and backed away. Then I remembered that his experience ... Views: 1736
Discover some of the underlying causes of racism and what is necessary to heal this scourge of our society.
I do not pretend to be an expert on what causes a person to be a racist, but I would like to explore some ideas based on the principles of Inner Bonding.
Those of you who have worked ... Views: 1135
Do you have the courage to risk loving yourself – even when you might encounter your children's uncaring behavior?
Most of us really don't like it when someone is angry with us. We don't like it when someone goes into resistance to helping us when we need help, instead of caring about us. We ... Views: 1627
Dr. Romance writes:
There was a time when life seemed very hard, so hard I tried not to think about it.. Several times I helped to destroy some very viable relationships. Changing myself, my life and my loves has been very exciting and fulfilling, yet I am still growing. Love Styles is intended ... Views: 1463
Recently, I went through very unpleasant and difficult dental work, and the outpouring of kindness I receivedfrom my husband, who held onto my ankle all through the two and a half hours (and had nightmares that night about it) to my dear friends, who offered me support and encouragement to ... Views: 1364
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Dear Dr. Romance:
I saw your video about couples fighting over finances
I am totally on board as I think what you share is phenomenal. The challenge is my approach I suppose as my wife Mel is almost NEVER on board. I guess we don't ... Views: 1752
Why the Nice biscuits are nice? I do not know if you think they are nice. Anyhow, there could be several reasons for them to be nice :
They are sweet
They are inexpensive
They are available
Some has brought them for you
Being a child, your mother used to offer them to you
Your friend ... Views: 1704
At one time or another, we've all complained that life isn't fair. Children do it all the time: Karen, who is older by two years, is allowed to stay up later than her younger siblings. They complain to dad that they're being treated unjustly, not realizing that at the same age her bedtime was ... Views: 1638
In the world of personal development there seems to be two lines of tought with regards to personality change. On one side of the spectrum, some say yes - you can and have to change. After all, you need to change in order to become the person you want to be. On the other hand, you have those who ... Views: 1708
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In my counseling office, I see a lot of damage done because people don’t know how to ask for what they want, or don’t think it’s OK. Not asking for what you want means you’ll eventually resent somebody, and that leads to a lot of strife. So today, I thought ... Views: 1428
Dear Dr. Romance:
I am a native American woman who has been abused and betrayed by my husband. He was my coresearcher and advisor for several years. We were married according to tribal custom, which he later denied happened and disowned me in the courts where he was ... Views: 1352
While each gender has the same value, it doesn’t mean that everyone feels this way. One can believe that men/women are worth more and this is then going to cause them to feel less than the opposite sex.
This could stop one from being able to have an intimate relationship on one side and on ... Views: 1613
Dear Dr. Romance:
I am mid-thirties mom with 3 children looking to divorce. I read your article "Family Violence Q & A" and I decided to write to you for help to stand on my feet again. I was a homemaker since I had my first child, but had lived very unfulfilled ... Views: 1596
THREE GOOD RELATIONSHIPS TO HAVE
By
Bill Cottringer
“We've got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant. You can't just accept it and leave it in the cupboard or just think it's going to get on by itself. You've got to keep watering it. You've got to really look after it ... Views: 1404
Fighting a lot? Dr. Romance recommends:
No matter what you’re fighting about: money, sex, kids or something else, the fighting is an indication that your communication isn’t working. If this happens only occasionally, such as when one or both of you are tired or stressed; it’s not too big ... Views: 1391