Michael Roth is The Official SelfGrowth.com Guide to "Overcoming Trauma". You can find complete information on Michael Roth and his products by visiting Transforming Trauma.
Over the years, someone may have put a lot of effort into their career. Thanks to this, they might have been able to make a lot of progress, with them achieving a high position and doing well financially.
However, regardless of whether they hold a high position or are well off financially, ... Views: 110
If someone were to take a step back and reflect on their life, what they may find is that they are often treated badly. Along with this, they could see that they generally don’t treat themselves very well.
However, they could see that being treated badly feels comfortable and that it takes a ... Views: 110
What someone may find, if they were to step back and reflect on their life, is that they continually end up with people who are emotionally unavailable. As a result of this, they are going to be used to being deprived in this area of their life.
Additionally, they may have had a very similar ... Views: 110
It might not matter if a woman is at work, has finished work or is on holiday, as her father might often contact her. Now, if he does ask her how she is doing, he could soon talk about his own problems.
Then again, he might rarely ask her how she is doing and could typically talk about his ... Views: 110
When a man starts dating a woman, he can end up putting on an act. This can be something that just takes place, as opposed to him consciously choosing to behave this way.
So, he can come across as confident and as though nothing bothers him. As a result, he is going to hide certain parts of ... Views: 110
Although a man can have the need to be with a woman and experience intimacy, he might not have been able to meet this need. His life might have been this way for as long as he can remember.
Thanks to this, he might believe that what is going on ‘out there’ is the issue. Then again, he might ... Views: 110
Deep down, someone can have the sense that they are only worthy of meeting their basic needs. Consequently, they can generally create a life where they survive but seldom if ever thrive.
But, if this is something that they are not consciously aware of, they can believe that this is just what ... Views: 109
What someone may find, if they were to step back and reflect on their life, is that they find it hard to feel safe. Due to this, they can spend a lot of time feeling exposed, with it being normal for them to feel anxious and even fearful.
The outcome of this is that they are seldom going to ... Views: 109
Even if a man had a mother who was emotionally unavailable and unable to provide him with the emotional nutrients that he needed, it doesn’t mean that he will be aware of this. He might not remember a great deal about this stage of his life.
But, if he were to think about this stage, he could ... Views: 109
Even though someone has the ability to express themselves, it doesn’t mean that they will. Instead, they can have the tendency to play a role.
To use an analogy, it can be as if they have a car that they can drive anywhere but they continually drive the car to the same places. Living in this ... Views: 108
For a little while now, a woman may have been with a man who is overly focused on his mother. Thanks to how caught up he is with her needs, he might seldom be physically, let alone emotionally, available.
If so, a lot of his time and energy will be directed toward his mother, leaving him with ... Views: 108
The other day, I was thinking about how, as human beings, we can say that we want one thing but do things that don’t match up with what we want. Along with this, we can question if it is possible to attain it and even criticise what we want.
As a result of this, we might not be able to attain ... Views: 107
Right now, at least one area of someone’s life might not be going as they want it to go. This area of their life might have also been this for as long as they can remember, which can add to the pain that they are experiencing.
So, they might have wanted to be in an intimate relationship for ... Views: 107
If a man was to look back on his life, he may see that he has experienced a lot of frustration over the years. He could see that this is because his needs have largely not been met in one or a number of areas of his life.
Being deprived is then going to be normal and this will have naturally ... Views: 107
What someone may find, if they were to step back and reflect on their life, is that they generally act as though they are an extension of others. Due to this, they will typically be focused on other people’s needs and do what they can to meet them.
It is then going to be normal for them to ... Views: 105
If one were to meet someone who they are attracted to and things went further, they could find that it is difficult for them to feel and express love for their partner. They are then going to be fond of them but they will feel restricted.
This can mean that they will find it hard to access ... Views: 105
If someone were to step back and reflect on their life, what they may see is that they spend a lot of time trying to fix other people’s problems. This can be how they are with their friends and their partner, that’s if they are in a relationship.
Along with this, they could often be this way ... Views: 105
If a man were to step back and reflect on his life, he may find that he generally doesn’t feel comfortable when he is around women. So, he could he could typically feel anxious and find it hard it relax.
As a result of this, he is rarely, if ever, going to fully show up when he is around ... Views: 105
If a man were to step back and reflect on how he sees women, he could find that he doesn’t have a positive view of them. So, he could see them as being out of reach, cold, critical and emotionally unstable.
This can show that, over the years, he has been with a number of women who were like ... Views: 104
Although certain areas of a man’s life might be going well, there might be one area that isn’t and it might have been this way for a while. So, his career could be going in the right direction and he might have a number of close friends, for instance.
However, when it comes to his love life, ... Views: 103
Right now, someone may be in a relationship that is anything but loving. So, they could be with someone who undermines them in a variety of different ways.
For example, they could rarely be seen or heard, receive affection, often be put down and humiliated and even be physically harmed. They ... Views: 101
If someone were to take a step back and reflect on their life, what they may see is that they have the tendency to hide themselves around others. Due to this, they won’t freely express who they are.
The outcome of this is that they will hide a number of their needs and how they feel. They can ... Views: 101
Even though someone will have the need to be seen and heard, this need might rarely, if ever, be met. The reason for this is that they could do what they can to stay in the background.
So, when they are at work, with friends and even with family, they could prefer to let other people talk and ... Views: 100
Although someone might not be aware of what they believe about themselves, what they believe will still have a big impact on the experience that they have. What this illustrates is how powerful their beliefs are.
When it comes to why they wouldn’t be aware of what they believe about ... Views: 100
Not too long ago, a man may have experienced a breakup. He may have been with a woman who didn’t treat him very well and be relieved that their time together has come to an end.
If so, this would have been a relationship that was anything but harmonious and there wouldn’t have been a great ... Views: 100
If a man were to step back and reflect on his life, he might see that he has spent a lot of time trying to make women like him. Along with this, he might see that he has been with a number of women who were unable to love him.
As a result, he can believe that there is something wrong with ... Views: 100
If a man were to step back and reflect on his life, what he may see is that he spends a lot of time trying to please women. So, over the years he might have been in a number of relationships where he lost himself.
Therefore, thanks to how focused he was on trying to make the women happy, he ... Views: 100
If someone has just gone through a breakup, they can be in a bad way mentally and emotionally. Due to this, what can often enter their mind is the thought of ending their life.
To a big part of them, this can be seen as the only way out of the misery that they are experiencing. And, just ... Views: 99
After having been with a man who is overly focused on his mother for a little while, a woman can think about cutting her ties with him. This is because she might not have the energy or the desire to continue living in this way.
But, if she has been in this position for a number of months or ... Views: 99
Even though someone is a separate individual, who has their own needs, feelings and life to lead, it doesn’t mean that they will act like one. Instead, they can act as though they are an extension of others and are thus, are here to meet their needs.
Due to this, they can then typically meet ... Views: 98
At this point in time, a man may be in a relationship that is not going well. The main reason for this is that he might find that it is not possible for him to be connected to how he feels when he is with his girlfriend.
If so, when he is with her, he will lose touch with how he feels. He ... Views: 98
If a woman is in a relationship, she may have found that the man that she is with has become less available as time has passed. So, during the early stages, he might have soon replied to her messages, called her, generally been available to meet, been affectionate and expressed his inner world, ... Views: 97
If someone has recently experienced a loss, they could be in a very bad way. They can have moments when they feel very sad and can’t stop crying, and moments when they shut down and are unable to feel anything.
Along with this, they can find it hard to get out of bed in the morning and ... Views: 97
Right now, a man could spend time with a woman who is with a man who is mistreating her. When they get together, they may or may not get affectionate and have sex, but he can spend a lot of time listening to her and being supportive.
He can often tell her that she doesn’t deserve to be ... Views: 97
After having been in a number of relationships that were anything but functional, a woman can end up in a relationship that is very different. This can be a relationship where the man (or woman) is reliable and consistent.
Due to this, what he says he will do will generally be what he does ... Views: 96
In general, someone’s emotional self may rarely, if ever, be settled, with them often being all at sea internally. Due to this, it might not be possible for them to live a normal life.
Now, it might not matter if they are around others or by themselves as they could struggle to handle what is ... Views: 96
If someone were to step back and reflect on their life, what they might find is that it’s as though they live in a desert. The reason for this is that they could seldom, if ever, receive what they need.
So, they might generally be able to meet the needs that allow them to survive, but that ... Views: 95
Although someone’s childhood will be well and truly behind them, it doesn’t mean that they have fully moved on from this stage of their life. Due to this, what happened and the impact it had on them can still have a big effect on their life.
However, if they are not aware of this, what is ... Views: 94
What someone may have come to see, if they have been reflecting on how they experience life, is that they don’t have a good connection with their emotional self. In general, it might be as if they don’t have an emotional self.
If this is the case, they are typically not going to be aware of ... Views: 94
What someone may find, if they were to step back and reflect on how they often feel, is that they often feel lonely. This is then going to be a time when they experience pain, as they are unable to meet their need to connect to another or others.
Now, this could show that they spend a lot of ... Views: 94
What someone could see is that no matter what they do or achieve, they don’t feel worthy or deserving of having their needs met. Instead, they can have the sense that they are worthless and undeserving.
Now, if they were to reach out to a friend and talk about what is going on for them, they ... Views: 93
What can be normal is for someone to spend a lot of time feeling empty and as though they are missing something. Along with this, they can often feel invisible and question if they even exist.
As a result, they are not going to feel whole and complete and know that other people can see them ... Views: 93
If someone were to think about what they were like when they last spent time around others, what might enter their mind is that they didn’t show up. What they can find is that it was as though they were wearing a mask and acted as though they were not a separate human being.
The reason for ... Views: 93
If a man is focused on his mother and is neglecting himself, it can be hard for the people in his life to understand what is going on. His friends and his girlfriend, if he has one, are then going to be confused.
For them, it could be clear that he is living in the wrong way and needs to ... Views: 93
At this point in time, someone could be in a relationship with someone who is not right for them. But, although this is the case, they can have a strong need to stay with them.
What they can also find is that when they are with their partner, they have the inclination to lose themselves. They ... Views: 92
At this point in time, someone could pay a lot of attention to what is taking place in the Levant. Along with this, they can pay a fair amount of attention to what is taking place in Eastern Europe.
They might not just see and hear about what is happening, feel a variety of different feelings ... Views: 92
If someone was greatly deprived during their formative years and is not in a good way now that they are an adult, the logical thing will be for them to do what they can to heal themselves. To do this, they can read books, take courses and work with a therapist or healer.
By taking these steps ... Views: 92
If a man has come to see that he is behaving as if he is an extension of his mother and is ignoring a number of his own needs, he can feel a strong need to do less for her and do more for himself. Then again, it might go further than this, as he might not want to do a great deal for ... Views: 91
If a man doesn’t have a woman in his life that he is seeing or in a relationship with, he may feel as though he is missing something. As a result of this, he can feel a strong need to be with a woman.
He can believe, for instance, that he is meant to be with a woman, and this is why he ... Views: 90
What can be normal is for someone to focus on other people’s needs and ignore their own. This is something that can take place without them consciously choosing to behave in this way.
Apart from meeting their basic needs, then, they will have the tendency to overlook their other needs. And ... Views: 90