Reldan Nadler is The Official SelfGrowth.com Guide to "Emotional Intelligence". You can find complete information on Reldan Nadler and his products by visiting True North Leadership.
Earlier on, it occurred to me that when it comes to working through emotional wounds, it is very similar to weeding a garden. At this point, you might wonder how the former has got anything to do with the latter.
Perhaps the reason why I was able to see this connection is that I have removed ... Views: 297
If someone has just gone through a breakup and even if this took place a few weeks or a number of months ago, they could be in a bad way. This could show that they were with their ex for a number of years, or it might not have been this long.
Additionally, this might have been a relationship ... Views: 296
If one spends most of their time on this planet living in their head, it will naturally mean that they will rarely inhabit their body. In general, then, what is taking place in his part of their being will be a complete mystery.
As a result of this, they are not going to have a good ... Views: 296
Most if not all of the experiences that a man had during his formative years might have been forgotten about by his conscious mind. Therefore, most of what took place during this stage of his life could be a mystery.
Nevertheless, while this might be the case, it doesn’t mean that what took ... Views: 296
If a woman is with a man who is overly focused on his mother and is out of reach emotionally, she is likely to wonder why she is even with him. Ultimately, he won’t have much time for her and even when he is around, he is unlikely to be very present.
Based on how he behaves, it will be clear ... Views: 296
After being with a man for a little while, a woman may see that he is being used by his mother. This is because he could spend a lot of time doing things for her and she could act as though he is responsible for her.
To make matters worse, he might not realise that he is overly focused on his ... Views: 296
When someone is born, they are going to be an embodied human being. That is, of course, unless their time in their mother’s womb and their birth was not traumatic.
By receiving the right attunement and care throughout this time, their connection to themselves will be supported and ... Views: 295
If someone feels happy, they could soon feel uncomfortable and their inner state could change thereafter. This could be something that is the rule as opposed to the exception.
But, if this is something that is normal, it might not be something that stands out. As a result of this, they are ... Views: 295
If someone was able to take a step back and reflect on their life, what might soon stand out is that they spend a lot of time trying to settle themselves down. This is going to show that they find it hard to feel at ease.
But, even if this is not something that they are aware of, what is ... Views: 295
If a man is in a position where he spends a lot of time focusing on his mother’s needs and neglects his own, it can be clear to the outsider that something is not right. After all, he will be an individual with his own life to lead; he won’t be here to act as an extension of his mother or anyone ... Views: 295
As someone is an individual with their own needs and feelings, they are not always going to want to do what another person wants them to do or suggests. If, on the other hand, they were merely an extension of others, this wouldn’t be the case.
Another person could want them to do something or ... Views: 295
What can be normal is for a man to feel angry and this could be something that the people in his life are only too aware of. The reason for this is that he could often come across as intense and rude.
It might go further, though, as there could be moments when he is violent and destroys ... Views: 294
After going through a breakup, a man could decide to take his time before he dates or merely share his body with another woman. If so, this can show that he has been greatly affected by what has happened.
Then again, this might not be the case but he might just want to take a break and focus ... Views: 294
When it comes to someone’s sexual side, it can be like another food that they have as part of a meal or it can be something that they have late at night. In other words, it can be something that is just part of a relationship that they are in or it can be something that they engage in with ... Views: 294
In order for someone to both survive and thrive, it will be essential for them to have the ability to stand up for themselves and make it clear when something isn’t acceptable. This will allow them to protect their physical, mental and emotional self.
There will be moments when they will need ... Views: 294
If a man is seeing or is in a relationship with a woman, he might not feel at ease and be able to let his guard down. This might not be because she has done something to make him question whether or not he can trust her, though.
No, he could just expect her to do something that will validate ... Views: 294
Even though a man will be an interdependent human being, it doesn’t mean that he will be able to act like one. The reason for this is that he might not be able to spend much time by himself.
When he is by himself, he could soon feel very uncomfortable and end up doing whatever he can to find ... Views: 294
At times, someone is going to need to stand their ground and not tolerate something. By doing this, they will be paying attention to their own needs and looking after their own well-being in the process.
At other times, they will need to go after what it is that they desire. This will also ... Views: 294
What someone may find, if they were able to detach from how they experience life, is that they have the tendency to feel low. This can mean that they will often feel depressed and they may even have moments when they think about ending their life.
They may find that this is how they have been ... Views: 293
During someone’s early years, they might have had at least one parent who didn’t treat them very well. If they did, this parent would have often been very cruel and, as a result, this would have deeply wounded them.
Still, it doesn’t mean that they will be able to acknowledge how cruel this ... Views: 293
A man could put a lot of effort into his appearance, with this being a way for him to receive a woman’s attention. This can mean that he spends a lot of time exercising, a lot of his money on clothes and is often at bars and clubs.
When he receives attention from a woman who he finds ... Views: 293
Before long, a woman may find that she is with a man who has two women in his life; his mother and her. He won’t just have a normal relationship with his mother, though, as she will be his main focus.
The woman, who should be his primary relationship, is then going to be like a woman that he ... Views: 293
Even though someone is a separate being that has their own needs and feelings, based on how they typically behave, it can be as though they are merely an extension of others. They are then going to be focused on other people’s needs.
Due to how caught up they are in other people’s lives, they ... Views: 292
If a woman is with a man who is overly focused on his mother, she could be totally fed up and wonder if she should cut her ties with him. She might have been with him for a few weeks, months or even a number of years.
Now, this might be the first time she has been in this position or she ... Views: 292
If a woman is with a man who is overly focused on his mother’s needs and neglects himself, she is likely to wonder why he doesn’t take care of his needs. Furthermore, she is likely to wonder why he doesn’t stand up to his mother and make it clear that he is not responsible for her.
Therefore, ... Views: 292
After a man has come to see that he is overly focused on his mother and her needs, he could wonder what is going on. Also, what could soon stand out is that he has been this way for as long as he can remember.
He will see that he has his own life to live and needs to meet but he will have ... Views: 292
If someone was to step back and reflect on their relationships, what might soon stand out is that they have pushed at least one person away. They could find that this person was warm and that the relationship was going well and then, before long, it ended.
Being in a relationship that was ... Views: 292
During someone’s formative years, they may have had at least one parent who was very harsh. If so, it would have been normal for them to be put down by this parent and treated like they were nothing.
Therefore, even if there were moments when this parent did treat them differently, it ... Views: 291
At this point in time, a man could be in a position where practically his whole life revolves around viewing porn. Therefore, if he is not working or spending time with friends, for instance, he could be viewing it.
Then again, there could be moments when he views it when he is at work. If ... Views: 291
Someone could spend a lot of time doing things and very little if any time relaxing and taking it easy. This could be how they have been for most of their life, though, so it might not be something that stands out.
Nonetheless, if they live in a society that is generally focused on the doing ... Views: 291
Even if a man fears women, it doesn’t mean that he will be consciously aware of this. If so, being this way will have a big impact on his life but he won’t realise what is going on.
But, while he won’t be aware of this, a friend or family member, for instance, could be aware of this. It might ... Views: 290
If a man is in a position where he is seldom there for himself and spends a lot of time doing things for his mother, he is going to be depriving himself of what he needs. Based on how he behaves, it will be as though he doesn’t have many needs.
However, although this is something that may ... Views: 290
What can be hard for someone to comprehend is why a man wouldn’t be able to see that he is focused on his mother and is neglecting himself. Now, the impact that his behaviour has on them is likely to depend on the type of relationship that they have with him.
Naturally, if this relates to a ... Views: 290
If someone was to take a step back and reflect on their life, what they may find is that they have the tendency to ignore their own needs. In fact, they could find that, in general, they are not even aware of their needs.
Apart from their basic needs, then, such as their need to eat and ... Views: 290
For someone to live a fulfilling life, they will need to be connected to their body and be in touch with their needs and feelings. The reason for this is that by being connected to themselves, they will be able to take life in, and this connection will provide them with the guidance that they ... Views: 290
What someone could struggle to get their head around, if they were abused as a child, is why their parent treated them in this way. The person who was supposed to love and cherish them wouldn’t have done so.
If they had been harmed by someone at school or a stranger, for instance, it would ... Views: 289
Ideally, someone will have received the love that they needed during their formative years in order to experience an emotional birth. In other words, they will have been able to form a strong sense of self and develop a felt sense of enoughness, worthiness and being lovable.
Thanks to this, ... Views: 289
If a man’s life revolves around his mother, what will stand out is that he is going to act more like an extension of her than a separate being that has his own needs and life to lead. At this point, it could be said that he just needs to implement boundaries with her and live his own ... Views: 289
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Even though someone can live a life where they often feel as though they are going to die, it doesn’t mean that they will be consciously aware of this. However, if they are not aware of this, they are still likely to suffer.
What can be normal is for them to experience a lot of anxiety and ... Views: 289
Irrespective of whether someone pays attention to the mainstream media or the alternative media, they are going to be aware of things that are taking place in the world that are bad. Perhaps the main difference, if they pay attention to the latter, is that they can be aware of things that are ... Views: 288
Although someone will have a number of different needs, it doesn’t mean that they will act like it. When it comes to how they live, it could be as though they only have a few needs.
There will be their survival needs and then there can be the other needs that they take care of. When it comes ... Views: 288
If a man is out with his friends, he can typically be easy-going and happy to go along with whatever another person wants to do. He is then going to go along to get along and he will rarely assert himself.
It might not be much different when he is at work, as he could be just as compliant and ... Views: 288
Although having needs and feelings is part of the human experience, it doesn’t mean that a man will feel comfortable with them. As a result of this, it could be normal for him to overlook them.
There can be moments when this is something that he is aware of and moments when this is something ... Views: 288
From the outside, it can seem as though a mother enmeshed man just needs to stop focusing on his mother’s life and to focus on his own. By doing this, he will be able to slowly transform his life and live a life that is worth living.
With this in mind, it will be up to him to draw the line ... Views: 288
In general, a man could be easy-going, needless and do his best to please others. He is then rarely if ever going to assert himself, express his needs or disagree with what another person says.
But, although how he comes across won’t be a reflection of who he really is; he could believe that ... Views: 288
Even though a man has his own needs and feelings and life to lead, he can act as if he is merely an extension of his mother. Due to this, he is going to neglect himself and his life won’t be very fulfilling.
However, this can just be what is normal, which means that he might not be aware of ... Views: 288
After being with a number of men who were overly focused on their mothers, a woman could question if she will ever meet a man who is actually available. To say that she will feel pretty hopeless when it comes to this area of her life could be an understatement.
But, as she has gone through ... Views: 288
After coming to see that he is overly focused on his mother, a man could believe that he would be different if his mother hadn’t used him during his early years. This could show that he has thought a lot about what took place when he was a boy.
He will then have come to see that he was forced ... Views: 288
In the article that I wrote about Yellowstone titled, ‘Can Someone Learn About Enmeshment By Watching Yellowstone?’, I briefly spoke about John’s youngest son, Kayce. I said that he was a loose cannon, and, in addition to the drama in his life, he was inches away from being killed or ending up ... Views: 288