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Conflict Resolution Articles
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- ***Strategies to Stop Fighting and Start Loving During the Holidays - by Submitted on Dec 06, 2012 from Sharon RivkinAre you tired of feeling stressed and angry during the holidays? Do you want this special time of the year to be filled with peace and joy? Do you wish for a fight-free holiday season with your loved ones? Make your Christmas wish come true by following these simple guidelines that will turn ...
Views: 1608 - 3 Keys To an Anger-Free Life - by Submitted on Sep 16, 2015 from Janet PfeifferHave you been upset about an issue that seems to make no sense and asked yourself, "Why did I get so angry over something that was relatively minor?" Oftentimes, our response is triggered not by the present issue but from an alternative source. Odd as it may seem, the past and future can hold ...
Views: 1608 - Joe Frasier's Got Nothing On Me (Reactive Anger) - by Submitted on Apr 23, 2014 from Janet PfeifferI was an instructor at the Learning Annex in NY City for many years. Classes ended at 9 pm and the ride home was a long one. One evening, after teaching an anger management course for three hours, I pulled into my driveway around 11 pm, exhausted and anxious to crawl into bed. I pulled my car ...
Views: 1608 - ***Things to Do Today: Ask for Help - by Submitted on Jul 21, 2010 from Margaret Meloni“Go ahead and tell me the steps you will take to complete this assignment.” This is the question that none of my early supervisors ever asked me on the job. And boy was I relieved that they never asked this question. Why? Because I had no clue! When I was new on the job I was afraid to ask ...
Views: 1607(1 vote) - Anger: Incident or Issue? - by Submitted on May 18, 2016 from Janet PfeifferIn the years that I facilitated my support group for estranged families, I primarily worked with older parents whose adult children had severed their relationship with them. The parents were perplexed: "I was a good parent", they declared. "I gave my children the best of everything. There is no ...
Views: 1606 - The Housemate Syndrome - by Submitted on Jun 23, 2011 from Dr. Mike GoslingDo you feel like housemates rather than lovers? Are you disconnected and feeling unloved? Deepest intimacy - When your relationship started and you were so 'in love', do you remember what it was like? Can you remember that you used to talk about everything? You spent every moment with each ...
Views: 1606 - How to Start and/or Stop and Argument - by Submitted on May 27, 2015 from Janet PfeifferBeing a part of any relationship for a period of time affords an individual the opportunity to learn what works and what doesn't with each respective person. I may be able to discuss politics with Uncle Joe but Aunt Sue? Never! He's open minded to other people's views and enjoys a lively debate. ...
Views: 1605 - "S~T~A" Away From Anger - by Submitted on Jan 06, 2016 from Janet PfeifferI love creating simple strategies individuals can use to experience less anger or stress in their lives, to improve their communications skills, resolve conflicts easier or create inner peace. From the SWaT Strategy* to TECO Magic*, The Great Duck and Dishtowel Debate* or the Seven C's of ...
Views: 1604 - HA-HA SORB APPROACH TO BULLIES - by Submitted on Jun 21, 2017 from Janet PfeifferPeople don't typically want to interact with those they consider to be bullies or tyrants. Yet contrary to popular belief, bullies are not bad people. It's their behaviors that are appalling. They act out their pain, loneliness, insecurities, and so on in the most offensive and unkind ways. But ...
Views: 1604 - ***You Decide to Resolve a Conflict, Now What? - by Submitted on Mar 05, 2010 from Margaret MeloniYou have observed a conflict between some of your team members and you realize you are the right person to help them reach a resolution. How do you KNOW this? You have carefully considered the situation, perhaps using “Can You SHOULD You Help Resolve the Conflicts Around You?” as your ...
Views: 1602(5 votes) - MOVING FORWARD FROM THE PAST - by Submitted on Mar 24, 2017 from Stacey Cox GiovanniStacey Cox Giovanni Life Time Success 4 U Here I am again. Just sharing with all of you the times we have of our ups and down happen to all of us. The question is how do we deal with it. I have been going through some things for some time now. And I will share with you the victim mentality ...
Views: 1600 - ***Next Time YOU Make a Mistake - by Submitted on Dec 08, 2009 from Margaret MeloniMost of you are your own worst critic. So when you make a mistake you are much harder on yourself than you would be on anyone else. It is completely normal to be disappointed with yourself, but the longer you beat yourself up the longer it takes for you to regain your confidence. If you ...
Views: 1595(2 votes) - WHEN TO FIGHT AND WHEN TO NOT - by Submitted on May 10, 2017 from Janet PfeifferI'm not much of a fighter. When I was a child, my dad taught me that if someone hits you, hit them back but never be the one to throw the first punch. In essence, only fight back when you have to defend yourself. My mom's message was taken from Luke 6:29 and contradicted Dad's: "If someone slaps ...
Views: 1592 - How Your Anger Benefits Me - by Submitted on Jul 08, 2015 from Janet PfeifferYour anger can actually benefit me. That sounds a bit ludicrous, wouldn't you agree? Anger hurts the one experiencing it but how can it possibly work to my advantage? If you become angry with me, I might feel upset, disrespected, scared, or angry in return. On a deeper level those emotions can ...
Views: 1590 - How to Get Hired For The Right Slot in This Economy - by Submitted on Oct 24, 2010 from Hal WechslerHow to Get Hired For The Right Slot – In This Economy Is it a scientific fact that whatever is measured – improves? Does Attention create Concentration and Comprehension, leading to learning strategies and a better working-memory? Your attention varies based on your motivation to learn ...
Views: 1590(4 votes) - Violence, 911, and War: There's a Better Way - by Submitted on Sep 11, 2013 from Janet PfeifferSince the beginning of time, wars have been fought in an effort to bring about peace. Have we accomplished that yet? Maybe violence isn't the answer. I am a peace lover. Not only do I promote peaceful coexistence but I also live peacefully with others. I do not argue or fight; I do not ...
Views: 1590 - Conflict Resolution - by Submitted on Feb 05, 2008 from Roger IngbretsenI once read “Virtually every true conversation (the honest exchange of thought) can lead to conflict!” At first I took exception to this statement; however I have come to believe that the words are right on target. Carl Rogers said: "Our first reaction to most statements is an ...
Views: 1589 - Anger and the 2 "F" Words - by Submitted on Aug 10, 2016 from Janet PfeifferNo, I'm not speaking about that "F" word. I'm going to address two different words beginning with the letter "f" and how they influence the decisions we make, our responses in any given situation, and how the outcome adds to or subtracts from our happiness and/or contributes to our anger. Those ...
Views: 1587 - Relationship Counselling / Couples Counselling - Why it's A Good Idea - by Submitted on May 21, 2012 from Richard ColeIf you are getting stuck in arguments relationship counselling is a good idea because you soon find out that there is more to understanding what is going on that you may initially think. It's wise to take time to evaluate and reflect before making big decisions; It might come as a surprise to ...
Views: 1580(1 vote) - Anger Management, Emotional Intelligence and How to Become Calm - by Submitted on Feb 23, 2011 from Iris FanningAnger management is one of the hallmarks of strong Emotional Intelligence or EQ. In Daniel Goleman's book Emotional Intelligence, he addresses being able to handle one's anger as a sign of high EQ. We know, from physiology, that within less than seconds of becoming angry our brain and body are ...
Views: 1579(1 vote) - Conflicts at Work - by Submitted on Feb 26, 2009 from Leland ShieldsDo you ever come home steaming about an interaction you had that day in your place of work? Are there people at your job you avoid or wish you could avoid? Do these relationships sour your job satisfaction? If so, you are not alone. A study in the mid 90’s reported that 84% of companies ...
Views: 1579 - Dealing With Insults Effectively - by Submitted on Jun 18, 2015 from Janet PfeifferMy husband is brutal: he teases and torments me unmercifully. But I'm just as bad. From the moment we wake up until we crawl exhausted into bed at the end of the day, we are constantly harassing one another. In fact, the first words out of his mouth as he opens his eyes at 5 am are "Are you ...
Views: 1576 - Family Feuds, Quick Tips to Resolve Them - by Submitted on Nov 19, 2014 from Janet PfeifferFamilies: they can be our greatest source of joy or a never ending cause of stress. Some might like to have a few parts replaced, others may prefer to trade theirs in for a more suitable model. Some are grateful to have a family regardless while others would prefer to travel through life solo. ...
Views: 1576 - Off to Mom's ... to see how enlightened we really are - by Submitted on May 03, 2011 from Jan DeniseOff to Mom’s … to see how enlightened we really are In keeping with this month’s travel theme and Mother’s Day, why not plan a visit to Mom’s? If you have a whole litany of excuses, maybe I can help. Let’s start by acknowledging that our deepest wounds are often created when we’re still ...
Views: 1576 - Now that I’m Married, How Do I Talk to My Spouse? - by Submitted on Dec 15, 2015 from Marcia Naomi BergerA successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. ---Mignon McLaughlin Can you imagine your partner and yourself holding a weekly formal meeting? The idea might intrigue ...
Views: 1575 - Why People Don't Get Along - by Submitted on Jan 13, 2016 from Janet PfeifferWhy is it so difficult for us to get along with one another? After all, we all have the same basic needs in life. We all want to be valued, to be acknowledged for the good that we do, to be treated fairly and given sufficient opportunities in life; we all want to be accepted as we are and to be ...
Views: 1574 - Can Prayer Really Help Relationships? - by Submitted on Jan 09, 2017 from Marcia Naomi BergerPersonally, I grew up with no encouragement to pray. I used to have a vague sense that prayer was for simple, naïve folks, that it was the “opiate for the masses.” So I do understand if you don’t relate to the concept. But perhaps you do. Most Americans Pray Daily. According to a Pew ...
Views: 1573 - ***Thinking Alike or Not Thinking? - by Submitted on Aug 20, 2010 from Margaret MeloniIt sure is easy when everyone agrees with you and tells you what you want to hear. But sometimes what we want to hear is not what we NEED to hear. This is when you need a dose of conflict or opposition or a contrarian. Unless you and all of your ideas are absolutely perfect 100% of the time, ...
Views: 1572 - ANGRY? GET OVER IT! - by Submitted on May 24, 2017 from Janet PfeifferToday my husband and I had our fifth fight. Not bad for a twenty year marriage but regardless, for an anger management professional such as myself, I didn't handle it very well. Actually, fight is not an accurate description as it was more like a huff, that is we got annoyed at each other. Let ...
Views: 1570 - Resilience Tips for Your Family Building Journey - by Submitted on Jun 13, 2011 from Joni S. Mantell, LCSW, MSWA process requiring resilience comes in two phases. First there is the crisis, a time when the loss or distress is often too unbearable for you to see opportunities that may be available. Once the distress fades away, you may start to see potential in a new situation and to gain a new ...
Views: 1565(2 votes) - ***YOU are a Role Model - by Submitted on Apr 30, 2010 from Margaret Meloni“To observe people in conflict is a necessary part of a child's education. It helps him to understand and accept his own occasional hostilities and to realize that differing opinions need not imply an absence of love.” … Milton R Sapirstein When children can see others disagree and disagree ...
Views: 1564(4 votes) - ***All that People Stuff - by Submitted on Apr 06, 2010 from Margaret Meloni“I am too busy doing the work to worry about all that people stuff”, said one of my students. “I am busy managing the project and updating the schedule and budget and making sure people don’t miss their deadlines, you know – doing the real work”, he continued. I wish I could tell you this was ...
Views: 1562(6 votes) - *** How to Resolve Instead of Just Solve Problems - by Submitted on Aug 25, 2013 from Valery Satterwhite“I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!” - Dr. Seuss In these hectic, often stressful days, many people measure themselves on ...
Views: 1560 - IT'S NOT FAIR! - by Submitted on Oct 18, 2017 from Janet PfeifferAt one time or another, we've all complained that life isn't fair. Children do it all the time: Karen, who is older by two years, is allowed to stay up later than her younger siblings. They complain to dad that they're being treated unjustly, not realizing that at the same age her bedtime was ...
Views: 1558 - Lead a Resilient Life - by Submitted on Apr 19, 2011 from Lynn ClarkeToday there are so many adverse situations and circumstances we are exposed to. Whether we are self employed or unemployed, single or married with children, young or old, we all can learn how to better cope in our lives when we learn how to be more resilient having the ability to cope, bounce ...
Views: 1557(1 vote) - When Silence Isn't Golden - by Submitted on Jan 27, 2016 from Janet PfeifferWe're all familiar with the phrase "Silence is golden". This proverb dates as far back as ancient Egypt, making reference to the importance of keeping quiet under certain circumstances. The first example of it being used in English is credited to the poet Thomas Carlyle in 1831. Certainly there ...
Views: 1557 - Healthy Anger - by Submitted on Mar 25, 2015 from Janet PfeifferAnger is one of the most powerful yet misunderstood emotions we experience. On the one hand, it has become a form of entertainment on TV, video games, social media, and Youtube. Housewives from states across the nation screaming at one another and flipping tables are cheered on each week by ...
Views: 1556 - Taking Care of Yourself - by Submitted on Mar 23, 2011 from Jo LaplaceI am a woman who historically has not taken care of me because my family has always come first. I did not believe the “well” would ever run dry. I believed I was a super Mom, Wife, Sister, Friend, Neighbor, Cheer Leader, Teacher, Specialist, Taxi Driver and every other person I could divide ...
Views: 1548(2 votes) - Decision Making Utilizing a New Perspective - by Submitted on Sep 16, 2010 from Bambi CorsoMany years ago, I attended a seminar given by Caroline Myss in Los Angeles, CA. During the course of the seminar, one young man raised his hand and asked a question. It seems he was confused, not yet knowing what to do with his life and facing a variety of job offers and opportunities. But he ...
Views: 1545(1 vote) - Winning Ways to Speak - by Submitted on Jun 20, 2018 from Cara DayWinning Ways to Speak by Cara Day The words you use, how they are put together, combined with the open, expansiveness of your eyes, your tone of voice, and the warmth of your body language help determine the quality of your communication with your children (and other loved ones). This is what ...
Views: 1542 - Your Mental Attitude Shapes Your Relationships - by Submitted on Aug 24, 2011 from Pamela LevinYour mental attitude has everything to do with how you get along with with others. If you have a positive attitude, you tend to create positive relationships, while a negative mental attitude breeds more of that same negativity. But how to improve your attitude if you need to? Where were you ...
Views: 1542(1 vote) - ***Conflict Takes Courage - by Submitted on Mar 24, 2010 from Margaret MeloniLast year there was an unfortunate incident at a military base in the United States. I am talking about Fort Hood. An individual started shooting people. Within hearing range of the shooting a graduation ceremony was taking place. Attending the graduation were medics and other trained personnel. ...
Views: 1541(2 votes) - WHEN ANGER MANAGEMENT DOESN'T WORK - by Submitted on Oct 26, 2016 from Janet PfeifferI've been teaching anger management and conflict resolution for nearly a quarter of a century. What makes me so successful in my work is that I do not lecture on any subject matter that I haven't personally experienced and mastered. In that regard, people find me authentic and know that if I've ...
Views: 1539 - 3 Simple Ways to Conquer Difficult People - by Submitted on May 10, 2009 from Michael LeeDealing with difficult people could become quite a challenge. Sometimes, they can take the form of a boss, co-worker, or even a friend or relative. Whatever the case may be, you need to stop losing your temper and start reading some tips for dealing with difficult people. Letting difficult ...
Views: 1538(1 vote) - How a NAME Will Improve Your Relationships - by Submitted on Jan 12, 2015 from Michael MantellSo you want to improve the way you and your spouse, partner, co-worker or friends at the gym communicate? There probably isn’t anyone anywhere that believes there isn’t room to improve in this most fundamental skill of life. If you disagree, at least do it agreeably ☺. The very structure of, ...
Views: 1537 - Resolving Conflict Through Fair Fighting - by Submitted on Jan 25, 2008 from Lauri Allison LaBadieConflict is present in all intimate relationships. Whether conflict is resolved constructively or acted out destructively is what determines its impact on the relationship. The following suggestions are designed to help couples resolve conflict by teaching them how to fight fairly. • ...
Views: 1537 - Lose Your Temper For Good! - by Submitted on May 11, 2016 from Janet PfeifferI've had many clients over the years request my help in teaching them how to control their tempers. "I lose my temper and afterwards feel terrible. I don't want to do this anymore. I need to learn how to control my temper." My response to them is this, "If you lose your keys you seek to find ...
Views: 1534(1 vote) - The Healthcare Bill and the Automatic Brain - by Submitted on Jan 11, 2011 from CHARLES GLASSMANThe tools of conquest do not necessarily come with bombs, and explosions, and fallout. There are weapons that are simply thoughts, ideas, prejudices, to be found only in the minds of men. For the record, prejudices can kill and suspicion can destroy. A thoughtless, frightened search for a ...
Views: 1534(2 votes) - "AR You Ready to Reduce Anger in Your Relationships?" - by Submitted on Jun 15, 2016 from Janet PfeifferRelationships are the most challenging aspect of life whether personal, professional, casual or intimate. Even with those we love deeply, such as family members, getting along can prove challenging. Consider this: more than half of all American families are estranged from one another due in part ...
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