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Articles from Oliver JR Cooper | Selfgrowth.com
- Defence Mechanism: Displacement - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperThis is a defence mechanism that is no different to any other, in that it allows the ego mind to ensure its own survival. If there is a situation where the ego mind perceives that it is unsafe to express an emotion or to behave in a certain way; the ego mind will have to suppress what is ...
Views: 2573 - Defence Mechanism: Escapism - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperThis is another of the defence mechanism that all of the others could be said to come under. Any one of the myriad of Defence mechanism comes under the purpose of escaping our current sense of dissonance, with the aim of removing the uncertainty and into a more familiar (safer) place, regardless ...
Views: 4364 - Defence Mechanism: Justification - by Submitted on Oct 01, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperNo matter what defence mechanism is being utilised, they all have the same purpose. And that is to stop one from being overwhelmed by what they are experiencing. They are used when the pain that is arising is too much for someone to handle. And as pain is part of life and therefore can’t be ...
Views: 2434 - Defence Mechanism: Projection - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperMost of us have heard of the term projection, but what is our subjective meaning when we think about it?. It could be argued that our whole experience of reality is a projection and that all of the Ego defence mechanisms are a projection, but for now I will remain in this context. I believe the ...
Views: 2451 - Defence Mechanism: Repetition Compulsion - by Submitted on Sep 23, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperWhen one experiences pain and it is not possible for them to face the pain that they’re experiencing, they’re going to end up using a number of defence mechanisms. This could be due to how traumatising the experience is or because it would be too much for them to face how they feel. A ...
Views: 3441 - Defence Mechanism: Repression - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperRepression, as I see it, is denying a situation of any expression or exposure, until it has gone from our awareness or rarely takes up too much of our attention. This can be brought about in two ways, which depend on the subjective severity of the experience. The first one is by the use of ...
Views: 2220 - Defence Mechanism: What Is Splitting? - by Submitted on Jan 03, 2019 from Oliver JR CooperWhen someone experiences emotional pain, and this pain is too strong for them to handle, their mind can end up using a defence to keep it at bay. In this sense, a defence is very much like a water dam, inasmuch as it is there to stop something from flooding in. After a little while, it will ...
Views: 1067 - Defense Mechanism: Dissociation - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperDissociation is the result of trauma we have experienced in our life. And by dissociating from the intensity of the trauma, we can minimize the suffering caused. With these experiences being subjective in nature and usually extremely overwhelming for the individual, they may however seem ...
Views: 4148 - Delayed Grief: What Is Delayed Grief? - by Submitted on Jan 07, 2019 from Oliver JR CooperIn the same way that it is not always possible for someone to eat when they are hungry, it is also not always possible for them to embrace how they feel after a loved one passes on. But, while they will most likely be able to ignore their hunger from time to time without it having much of an ...
Views: 1130 - Delaying Gratification: Is Delaying Gratification An Important Part Of Success? - by Submitted on Jun 16, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperAs time has passed, there has been a greater need for everything to happen faster. The pace of the world has rapidly increased and a lot of people no longer want to wait for things. In some cases, if someone wants something they will want it now and if they can’t have it now, then they might end ...
Views: 1785 - Denial Is Like A Parasite That Takes Over Someone's Mind - by Submitted on May 16, 2019 from Oliver JR CooperLike most defence mechanisms that can be utilised, denial can make it easier for someone to function on this planet. By denying something, it can stop them from having to feel bad about themselves, allowing them to avoid pain. Their view of themselves will then be protected and this will ...
Views: 717 - Dependent: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone to Be Dependent? - by Submitted on Mar 16, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone is an adult, it doesn’t mean that they will be able to stand on their own two feet and support themselves. This is likely to mean that they will either still need their parents/s or others to be able to survive. As a result of this, how they look is not going to match up with ...
Views: 362 - Dependent: Why Are Some People Dependent? - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperWhen people talk about what it means to be an adult, being independent is never too far away. Here, one will be empowered to live their own life and to support themselves. So whereas a child is dependent on their caregivers to survive, an adult is not dependent on anyone in particular. And so ...
Views: 2329 - Depression: Can Depression Be A Defence Against Pain? - by Submitted on Nov 03, 2025 from Oliver JR CooperEven though someone might have been able to function and perhaps function very well for most of their life, it could now be very difficult for them to do so. The reason for this is that they could generally have very little, if any, energy. If so, it won’t just be a challenge for them to do ...
Views: 97 - Depression: Can Early Deprivation Cause Someone To Be Depressed As An Adult? - by Submitted on Oct 13, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperUp until recently, someone may have typically been full of life and taken life by the horns, to so speak. But, after something has taken place, they could have very little if any energy and have just about lost all their drive to do anything. As a result of this, if they were to reach out for ...
Views: 310 - Depression: Can Feeling Helpless Cause Someone To Be Depressed? - by Submitted on Feb 20, 2017 from Oliver JR CooperThere can be times when someone’s life will go how they want it to and times when it won’t. It could be said that this is simply part of life, and not something that can be changed. However, although this is the case, it is going to be down to one to decide how they will respond when it ...
Views: 1469 - Depression: Can Living In An Oppressive Environment Cause Someone To Be Depressed? - by Submitted on Apr 03, 2016 from Oliver JR CooperWhile there are some people who have lived in the same environment for their whole life, there are others who have moved around. When one has moved around, they might not have stayed in the same place for very long. This could be a sign that one has a job that requires them to move around, ...
Views: 2418 - Depression: Can Repressed Anger Cause Depression? - by Submitted on Jan 25, 2015 from Oliver JR CooperOne of the most common mental and emotional challenges that someone can face in today’s world is depression. This is likely to be something that most people experience at one point or another. There are then going to be others who don’t experience it from time to time, they experience it on ...
Views: 2481 - Depression: Can Repression Cause Depression? - by Submitted on Aug 13, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperIn today’s world, depression has become a word that carries enormous weight; either for people who have it or for people who hear about it. It could also be described as a modern day taboo, with people often wanting to avoid the whole thing. However, what is clear is that depression is not ...
Views: 2285 - Depression: Can Shame Stop A Man From Being Able To Admit That He Is Depressed? - by Submitted on Jun 06, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man is depressed, it doesn’t mean that he will be able to fully accept this. He can then do just about everything that he can to hide what is really on for him from both himself and others. One of the ways that he can do this is by more or less always being on the go and being focused on ...
Views: 353 - Depression: Can Someone End Up Depressed If They Ignore Their Anger? - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperWhen someone exercises, they are likely feel better, and this can be how they feel for a little while afterwards. There are going to be a number of reasons as to why this is, but one of the things that will have had an effect is all of the energy that was released. This is not the ...
Views: 1308 - Depression: Can Someone Think Their Way Out Of Depression? - by Submitted on Apr 02, 2017 from Oliver JR CooperIt is often said that it can be a lot harder for one to have a mental and emotional problem than it can be for them to have a physical problem. And there are a number of reasons as to why this is. For one thing, if one has something wrong with their inner world, they can feel too ashamed to ...
Views: 1354 - Depression: Can Someone’s Inner Critic Cause Them To Feel Depressed? - by Submitted on Oct 24, 2018 from Oliver JR CooperIn the same way that a child will most likely perform a task better if their parent is speaking to them in a supportive manner, an adult is also likely to be able to perform a task better if they are talking themselves in a supportive manner. Not only this, it will be a lot easier for them to do ...
Views: 1022 - Depression: Can Toxic Shame Cause Depression? - by Submitted on Mar 12, 2016 from Oliver JR CooperWhile someone can feel down from time to time, they can also feel this way on a regular basis. When this is the case, it is going to be a challenge for them to appreciate life, and it may even be a challenge for them to get out of bed in the morning. Another Experience Now, when one feels ...
Views: 1669 - Depression: Can Trapped Grief Cause Depression? - by Submitted on Jan 09, 2015 from Oliver JR CooperWhile a physical problem can stand out, an emotional problem can remain hidden. Yet, even though there can be a difference here, it doesn’t mean that one problem is more important than other. Ultimately, it doesn’t matter what kind of pain one is experiencing, what matters is that they seek ...
Views: 1918 - Depression: Is Self-Awareness An Important Part Of Dealing With Depression? - by Submitted on Apr 24, 2016 from Oliver JR CooperEveryone on this planet will have experienced physical pain at one point or another, and there is also the chance that they have suffered mentally and emotionally. And although it could be said that there is a greater awareness around the former than the latter, it doesn’t mean that this is ...
Views: 2649 - Depression: Why Do Only Some People Feel Depressed When They Are Carrying Toxic Shame? - by Submitted on May 25, 2016 from Oliver JR CooperIt has been said that depression is one of the most common mental and emotional problems in today’s world, and while some people might experience it from time to time, there are others who are more familiar with it. This is then not going to be something that affects everyone is the same ...
Views: 1365 - Depression: Why Do Some People Get Depressed When They Give Up Extreme Sports? - by Submitted on Jan 21, 2020 from Oliver JR CooperIn recent years, a lot has been said about mental and emotional health and how so many people are not in a good way. Largely, the focus has been on the inner challenges that the average person is trying to deal with. Along with this, there have been times when different celebrities have come ...
Views: 839 - Depression: Why Would Someone Be Depressed Even Though They Have A Good Life? - by Submitted on Jun 23, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAt this point in time, someone could find it hard to understand why they are experiencing life in a certain way. Based on the life that they lead, they can believe that they shouldn’t be the way that they are. The reason for this is that their life could be good in so many ways and yet they ...
Views: 347 - Deprivation: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Deprive Themselves? - by Submitted on Apr 17, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone will have a number of different needs, it doesn’t mean that they will act like it. When it comes to how they live, it could be as though they only have a few needs. There will be their survival needs and then there can be the other needs that they take care of. When it comes ...
Views: 310 - Deserving: Why Don't We Get What We Deserve? - by Submitted on Apr 12, 2013 from Oliver JR CooperThis is an area that can not only create frustration, anger and confusion; it can also make one feel powerless and a victim of circumstance. So here I am going to explain my current understanding, as to why we don’t always get what we think we deserve and can end up with something completely ...
Views: 2452 - Developing Self-Belief Doesn't Happen Overnight - by Submitted on Jul 02, 2020 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone is in a position where they lack self-belief, they may look into what they can do to develop it. Then again, they could merely put up with what is taking place and do their best to carry on as normal. The reason for this is that they may believe that there is nothing that they can ...
Views: 805 - Developmental Trauma: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Believe That There is Not Enough? - by Submitted on Sep 13, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was able to step back and reflect on how they experience life, what may soon stand out is that they often struggle when it comes to having enough. What could enter their mind is that they rarely have enough money. After taking a closer look, though, they may find that there is far ...
Views: 305 - Developmental Trauma: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Lose The Will To Live? - by Submitted on Dec 24, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperWhat someone may find, if they were to reflect on their life, is that they find it hard to be motivated. Therefore, if they do feel the urge to do something, it might not be long until this is no longer the case. Thanks to this, it is going to be a challenge for them to stick to things and ...
Views: 440 - Developmental Trauma: Can Someone Be Frozen In Time If They Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Aug 09, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperJust because someone is now an adult and their developmental years are thing of the past, it doesn’t mean that they have truly moved on from this stage of their life. However, if this is the case, they might not be consciously aware of it. The signs that reflect that they haven’t moved on ...
Views: 384 - Developmental Trauma: Can Someone Carry A Wounded Infant If They Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Feb 23, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperAlthough someone is an adult and thus their childhood will be well and truly behind them, it doesn’t mean that this is actually the case. Of course, they will no longer be a toddler, infant or even a child; that will be clear from their appearance. But, while this will be clear from the ...
Views: 340 - Developmental Trauma: Can Someone Have A Fear Of Falling Apart If They Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperBased on how someone typically comes across, they can appear to be a together human being. However, beyond the impression that they create can be someone who doesn’t have firm foundations. Thanks to how they live their life, though this could be something that they are not fully aware of. ...
Views: 310 - Developmental Trauma: Can Someone’s Brain Make It Hard For Them To Realise That They Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Apr 02, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperAt the beginning of someone’s life, they might have been deeply traumatised, but, now that they are an adult, they might not be aware of this. This stage of their life could be a complete mystery to them, or they could say that it wasn’t that bad, for instance. However, even if this stage of ...
Views: 300 - Did A Mother-Enmeshed Man’s Mother Make Him Into Her Parent? - by Submitted on Sep 08, 2024 from Oliver JR CooperIf a man were to take a step back and reflect on his life, he may see that he is more like his mothers parent than her son. The reason for this is that he could spend a lot of time doing things for her. Yet, even when he is not doing anything for her, he could still spend a lot of time ...
Views: 249 - Did You Have To Give Up Parts Of Yourself To Be Accepted As A Child? - by Submitted on Jul 09, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperDuring someone’s early years, they may have generally been able to express themselves. So, while they may have had to lose touch with certain parts of themselves, they won’t have had to completely lose themselves. Alternatively, this may have been a time when they were generally unable to ...
Views: 796 - Disappointment: Do You Always End Up Feeling Disappointed When You Get Your Hopes Up? - by Submitted on Oct 12, 2014 from Oliver JR CooperOne is going to have moments in their life where having something to look forward to enables them to get through their day, and this could be something that lasts for quite some time. This could be because what they’re doing is something they would rather not be doing or perhaps one is going ...
Views: 5029 - Disconnected: Can A Big Part Of Someone’s Being Be Split Off If They Experienced Developmental Trauma? - by Submitted on Jun 06, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperEven if someone is living on the surface of themselves, it doesn’t mean that they will be consciously aware of this. How they experience life can just be what is normal, so there will be no reason for it to stand out. Assuming that they are in this position, they are likely to spend a lot of ...
Views: 380 - Disconnected: Can Childhood Trauma Cause Someone To Disconnect From Their Body? - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2020 from Oliver JR CooperIt might be hard for someone to comprehend how another person could be out of touch with their body and live on the surface of themselves. As far as they are concerned, this could be seen as something that is not possible. They could think that as their body is connected to them, there is no ...
Views: 788 - Disconnected: Can Childhood Trauma Cause Someone To Live In A Disconnected State? - by Submitted on May 19, 2021 from Oliver JR CooperFor someone to live a life that is in alignment with who they are, they will need to have a good connection to their own body. The reason for this is that this part of their being will provide them with the guidance that they need. Their feelings, needs, preferences and desires will be found ...
Views: 349 - Disconnected: Can Childhood Trauma Cause Someone To Separate From Their Body? - by Submitted on Oct 09, 2020 from Oliver JR CooperEven though someone will have a head and a body, it doesn’t mean that they will be in touch with both parts of their being. Instead, they could be connected to what is taking place in their head and very rarely be connected to what is taking place in their body. Still, it doesn’t mean that ...
Views: 743 - Disconnected: Can Developmental Trauma Cause A Big Part Of Someone To Be Split Off? - by Submitted on May 25, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperEven though someone will look whole and complete on the outside, it doesn’t mean that they will feel whole and complete on the inside. When it comes to their inner experience, they can feel cut off and as though they lack substance. Then again, how they experience life can just be what is ...
Views: 546 - Disconnected: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Disconnect From Their Body? - by Submitted on Jul 06, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIf someone was to get into a relationship, what could soon stand out is that they don’t have a good connection to their needs and feelings. Before this, they might not have realised how disconnected they were. But, now that they need to be in touch with both of these elements, it will be ...
Views: 355 - Disconnected: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Disconnect From Their True Self? - by Submitted on Jul 30, 2023 from Oliver JR CooperWhen someone is born, they are going to be an embodied human being. That is, of course, unless their time in their mother’s womb and their birth was not traumatic. By receiving the right attunement and care throughout this time, their connection to themselves will be supported and ...
Views: 327 - Disconnected: Can Developmental Trauma Cause Someone To Feel Disconnected? - by Submitted on Mar 04, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperIt has been said that someone’s ego allows them to have their own experience on this earth, among other things. Therefore, this part of them causes them to see themselves as separate from everyone and everything. So, while this will allow them to have their own experience, which can be seen ...
Views: 320 - Disconnected: Can Self-Development Cause Someone To Become Even More Disconnected? - by Submitted on Apr 24, 2022 from Oliver JR CooperWhen someone ends up getting into self-development, they could already be in a pretty shut-down state. However, if they have been this way for most of their life, they might not even realise it. But, although they might not have a good connection with their body and thus, their feelings and a ...
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