Healing Ego Illusions

Question:

I've been of the belief for some time that a great goal would be to eliminate the influence of the ego. One sentence you wrote in either The Book of Secrets or Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire (I read them back to back) had such a profound effect I must share it.

I decided to have an inner dialogue with my ego. It appeared as a fierce dragon until I began to thank it for keeping me alive during a painful childhood. It is my understanding that we must be within our body to become enlightened (Is this true?) so I felt grateful for its help, even though it became a major problem as I grew to adulthood. The dragon began to sob and said, "I'm so exhausted!" I asked if it would like a hug and it sobbed harder as it bent to offer its head. I asked it if we could work together and assured it that by relinquishing control to our High Self, we could both benefit. The dragon agreed. At that moment I was so filled with love I felt decades of anger evaporate. What is most astonishing is that I've had a knot of anxiety nearly all my life (60 years) and it disappeared.

This happened a few days ago and I feel different. I now wonder if the ego has never been the problem. If we choose to experience physical reality, it's necessary. But if it becomes overstressed it begins to turn on itself. I developed Grave's Disease years ago. Could this be directly related to not following the will of my higher self? I think I know the answer already but while I'm here I would like to express my gratitude to you for sharing your years of study, dedication and spiritual development?

Answer:

That was a beautiful breakthrough experience you had. I would agree with you that the ego itself is not the problem as much as it is a misappropriation of selfhood by the ego that causes the problem. When the ego believes that it is your true self, it then feels threatened by others and the world. It reacts to this fear with a desire to control, with anger and a need to be right. That is very exhausting work because life cannot be controlled or dominated by our limited will.

I can’t say with any certainty that your diagnosis of Grave’s disease is directly related to your prior state of spiritual imbalance, but the inner disconnection certainly didn’t help. It’s enough to know that releasing yourself from this intense illusion will be a powerful component to your healing process.

Love,

Deepak