Using No As A Stepping Stone To Yes

I grew up in Chappaqua, New York. Chappaqua is an affluent suburb twenty-five miles north of New York City where I was exposed to pretty much any opportunity you can think of. I was accustomed to the good things in life, and this made me desire to attain all of this and more when I became an adult. Even as a young girl, I always dreamed big. I would daydream of being a super model and having my photo taken by all the important magazines, being a professional athlete competing in the Olympics, or a multimillionaire being chauffeured around in a limousine. I always knew that one day I would be successful, no matter what other people’s thought of me. My parents always encouraged me to pursue my dreams and never stood in my way.

My first dream at the age of twelve was being a professional tennis player. Since I started playing tennis when I was eleven at the age most people considered too late for professional competition, all I heard was that I could never be good enough to turn pro and shouldn’t waste my time and effort. I wasn’t going to let that stop me. My dream was like the bull’s-eye on a dartboard. My determination and focus was piercing. I was going to be a top player, no matter what sacrifices were required. I trained daily after school, went to weekly tennis lessons given by a top Australian coach, and played in a tournament practically every weekend.

A Vital Lesson

Along the way my tennis coach, Alan Lane, taught me a vital lesson that I still utilize to this day. He taught me to look in the mirror every morning and tell myself, “I love who I am,” as well as additional positive statements such as, “You are a great tennis player, and you will win matches. You have the potential to be the best tennis player ever.” If you follow this lesson as well you will be amazed at the way your subconscious mind changes its way of thinking, and you will start to see results. You have to love yourself before others can love you. You have to be grateful for all that you have before the universe will send more your way.

I spent the next few years playing in tournaments, and I achieved a top ranking on the East Coast. To date, I am the first and only female tennis player at Horace Greeley High School to go to the New York state finals. I played #1 singles for my high school and rarely lost a match. During my senior year I was approached by a sports agent who presented me with multiple full tennis scholarships to colleges I dreamed of attending. I’m not telling you this to brag, but rather to show you an example of how I overcame years of nos and never gave up. If you put your mind to something and stay focused, you too can achieve great things.

After playing college tennis for two years I knew I wanted to turn pro. This meant finding a sponsor to pay for everything. This is a tough task because sponsors pay for private coaching, entry fees to tournaments all around the world, and all travel expenses, which can amount to a minimum of $100,000. I cannot tell you how many wealthy individuals and corporations told me no. Desperate and determined, I proceeded to get dressed in my tennis best, printed out my tennis resume, and began to drive around to the wealthiest neighborhoods. I knocked on homeowners’ doors and gave them my speech.

One day I got the courage to call Nick Bollettieri, who coaches some of the world’s top tennis players and was always on TV. People thought I was crazy calling someone so famous. Nick told me he was coming to New York for the U.S. Open and would watch me play, and if he thought I had potential he would sponsor me. Well, I played my heart out, and he said yes! I can’t imagine my life today if I hadn’t made the decision to pick up the phone and make that call. Taking that risk gave me the reward of playing on the pro tour for four and a half years and traveling all over the world. Even though I didn’t reach the top 100 world rankings, I am proud of what I achieved. Even though all along I kept hearing how I would never achieve my dream, how nobody would sponsor me, how I started too late, etc., I made it happen and nobody can take that away from me. I learned how to channel those nos into finding that one yes. It was my perseverance that changed my life forever.

New Dreams

I stopped playing tennis when I was twenty-four years old and proceeded to my next dream in life, the dream of working on a trading floor. When I began to interview I was often told that I didn’t have the appropriate degree or family connections to get the position. I decided to accept a junior position, which I’m sure most people would snub their noses at, but at least I was working on the trading floor. I now had access to people who made decisions. I worked on the bond-trading floor, where there were only five women out of 500 employees. I asked the senior manager every single week if I could be given the opportunity to interview along with all the other men for an opening, and every week he told me no. He also told me that it was never going to happen, and that I should just accept it and quit.

This went on for the next year and a half – until finally one time he said yes! There were twenty-five candidates that interviewed for a retail government sales position, and I was offered the job! Again, even though for a year and a half all I heard was no, I kept believing in my dream. I knew one day I would finally be told yes. I often wonder how my life would have been different if I gave up right before the opportunity was offered. I often hear of people quitting days before their big break would have happened.

Back to the Corporate Grind

After five years working on the trading floor I moved to London, got married, and had my son Christopher. I then stayed home with my son for eight years and was content being the best mother I could be. Unfortunately, my marriage ended and I got a divorce. By then we had moved back to the U.S., and in order for my son to stay in the wonderful school system we cherished, I had no choice but to go back to work. Back to the corporate world I went. Back to a long commute, sixty-hour workweeks, stressful days, and constant rushing. Most importantly, I missed being home with my son. After dedicating myself to a top global bank for nine years, I was laid off without so much as a thank you. That’s when I made the decision that I wouldn’t go back into the corporate world; I had enough. I made the choice that I was going to be an entrepreneur and start building my own castle once again. I would find a home-based business that would enable me to stay home with my son and give me control of my finances and my future.

Success Is a Choice

When I shared my decision with my fellow coworkers, they told me I was crazy, that it was too risky, and that all home-based businesses were scams. I realized they were afraid of taking the risk, and I didn’t listen to their advice. After looking at many businesses, I joined Wealth Masters International. I now spend all the time I want with my son, work from the comfort of my home, and earn more money than I did in the corporate world. I have surrounded myself with like-thinking minds and fellow entrepreneurs with the same goal in life.

I will leave you with a thought. Success is a choice. If you don’t make a decision today, then nothing will ever change tomorrow. Believe in yourself, stopping listening to the nos, and say yes to the lifestyle of your dreams!